LIFE IS A NEW DRESS

Prom Girl Photo
Photo courtesy of PROMGIRL

LIFE IS A NEW DRESS is the topic for the blog. I had a recent opportunity to share this thought with a young person about relationships and life. As I usually do, I compared relationships to something I can easily relate and felt you may enjoy this true to life analogy too.

Have you ever seen a dress or other piece of clothing in a store and thought immediately  this had to have been made with you in mind? As you looked at it hanging up, it was perfect. It would hang on your body exactly as it should and would compliment everything you liked about yourself. The length (or height) was a compatible match. The color was one that made you feel good about yourself and lightened your mood. It was dazzling on how easy it was to put on. It simply was the best dress and even though it was expensive and you might have to sacrifice to have it as your own, the sacrifice seemed worth it. You might have had to wait a time period before you could actually acquire it to take it home to be yours and yours alone.

Prom Girl

While this thought may seem the ideal analogy of a relationship of love, I am not quite finished with this life lesson. Let’s go back to the store and acquire that relished dress. We buy it and with the highest anticipation, we leave the store where we first encountered this dress. The dress was placed in a bag to protect it but it got somewhat wrinkled from the bagging. You are disappointed by the wrinkling as this dress was perfect and a little resentment toward the clerk who should have taken better care of your prized possession. A little of the glittering desire seems to diminish and you have to consider how to get the wrinkles out. That is okay and once the dress has had a little time to hang, the wrinkles disappear and all is well again.

Prom Girl 1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You take painstaking effort to present yourself with proper hair, makeup and accessories to show off your newly acquired beautiful dress to anyone who will look and hear about how it was made for you. If anyone compliments your attire, you beam. If anyone doesn’t think it is the best thing you have ever put on, you write them off your friend’s list forever……and then it happens!

By accident, someone spills a drink on your beautiful dress. The stain, even though it is small, seems to take center stage and that is all you can see. You forget how the dress fits you to a tee, how everyone thinks it is wonderful, and how you feel in the dress. The stain, that dreadful stain has “ruined” your dress. Even though the stain is reversible and can be removed, do you let it spoil that perfect moment you first laid eyes on it? Do you allow this awkward moment to overwhelm you? Do you feel like throwing it away since it can never be pure and stainless again?

Prom Girl 2

Now, for the life lesson and how this moment and experience is similar to a new relationship in life. We meet someone and we feel they are perfect. That same desire and longing is present and we will sacrifice and do whatever we can to have the relationship we have longed for all of our lives. We begin to spend time with this person and even if it has a wrinkle or two, we overlook them and even hang them up for a while by backing away for a little space to give our hearts time to realize we still like this person and maybe even love them.

You introduce them to your friends and some of your friends think they are the best thing that ever happened you. You beam from the compliments and sorely disagree with those who don’t click immediately with your newly found love.  And then it happens……it can be a multitude of life accidents that put a stain on your new relationship and many times, it is a misunderstanding or circumstances you cannot control. The stain appears and it is exactly the same as I described with the new dress. The same feelings can arise. You doubt if it was that perfect. You question if it fit that well after all and in many cases, you may consider throwing it away.

Final Thoughts: All of us will experience the stains of life. We have to learn to move past those episodes in our lives to remain excited and encouraged. The dress of life or a deep relationship can survive many stains and we have to remember that we would never feel true love or existence if we shy away from acquiring a love to protect ourselves from true reality of life. A good stain remover is having a great sense of humor and not to embed our minds in disappointment but invest ourselves in those fun and loving moments A NEW DRESS can bring. LIVE LIFE; LOVE LIFE; AND KEEP A GOOD STAIN REMOVER OF LAUGHTER ON HAND.

(C) COPYRIGHT 2012-2017 Arline Miller with all rights and privileges reserved. Third party material if source is known is referenced for credit. All photos are not exclusively the property of Sipping Cups unless stated

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IT IS TIME TO SAY GOODBYE

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Good morning Readers,

I have been blogging since 2012 and my first post was in November. I have enjoyed being a blogger and seeing the likes and comments. I especially enjoyed looking at all of the readers in so many countries and languages and thinking what do you think of this southern gal? I have decided when you get to be 68 years old, there are many other adventures I may want to try and a blog requires a lot of discipline and dedication.

I thought I would take a few minutes and share with you the reader what excited a blogger the most, or at least me. There have been a few, not as many as I thought, who have been faithful to share the blog. Each and every time my blog was shared, I smiled not from ego but knowing someone used their valuable time and shared what I had written for others to read. I felt close to the reader when the blog has been liked but felt like a member of the reader’s family when it was shared.

Duchess seeing herself on FB

I have kept a Sipping Cups of Inspiration Facebook page but I will be taking it down too. What am I going to do? Some of you will not miss me and that is perfectly okay. Each of us have to live our lives the way we see fit. One thing I would love for you to take away from all of my rantings and hopefully inspiring with a few humorous tidbits thrown in is Live Life Your Way. Enjoy your journey and never be a carbon copy of anyone. Sure, it is great to have a mentor, advisor, spiritual leader, friend, employer, or even a stranger led a hand and give you advice. The key is to dive in deep within your heart, mind, and soul and choose the path.

Buster 1

Both of our furbabies, Duchess, our terrier and Buster our Papillon have appeared on my blog and they say Thank YOU in their own way. They advocate for others who have been rescued and live the happy life in their forever homes. Please support rescues.

Let me humbly say thank you to each and every person who has read and/or shared the blog. It has been a blast but as the adventurous “Seenager” I am, I have new paths to roam, flowers to pick, songs to listen to as I still cannot sing, recipes to try. The blog will stay up for a while for you to read for a while, but January it will go to the archives of life. May God bless All of You!

Sipping Cups of Inspiration cover(C) Copyright 2012-2017 Arline Miller, blogger of Sipping Cups of Inspiration with all rights and privileges reserved.

COLORS OF LAW RELATE TO PARENTING

TODAY THE WORDS are COLORS OF LAW. Where can I go with this topic, you may ask. In courts, we have heard over and over, the law is clear, and it is either black or white. It is defined by the letter of the law. We have used the terminology to express some event or thinking as black or white. Judges speak out after the media hyped cases they had to make their rulings, decisions, or what evidence was entered based on the way the law reads and not their personal beliefs. This is truly stating the black or white description of the law.

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However, when did moral “laws” become gray? In today’s world, we see a blurring of the moral codes in so many fashions. When children dress so inappropriately, pierce, or tattoo themselves to the point of embarrassment, it seems society has decided these are gray areas and use the terms, “they are just expressing themselves”. I realize, as I can imagine so many of the readers are reacting to my statements as judgmental. I would apologize but I go back to my upbringing which was a strict life, but a good life. My parents would not have allowed me or my sister to have gone out of the house with inappropriate dress or makeup. They would not have allowed language I hear children using which is not flattering to them. For the life of me, I don’t even have a clue as to what they would have thought of body piercing except for “freaky”. I understand I am stepping on toes, but here is the point, not my point, but an observation. If you expect your children to respect you as a parent, have you thought if they don’t see black and white they get confused on what is acceptable or not. Children look to their parents and yes, they are influenced by celebrities but that isn’t to be used as okay, as all of you can remember we had celebrities too. Thank goodness, most of them kept their clothes on.

PARENT AND CHILD 3

The gray area is where children get confused and I think parents do too. The point of grayness is controversial and it is still up to the individual parent to voice their approval or disapproval. Why are parents so hesitant about guiding their children or is it a lack of interest? Have parents become distracted from being true parents? Are they occupied with their interests and let the children loose? Have you thought they may be trying to get your attention with their actions? I may be sounding harsh, but my thoughts are some of the actions may go away with age but it is our job as parents to nourish our children and not only with food. Love will become more important if a child feels respected, loved, cherished, and honored. If they respect you; they will follow “most” of your values. Parents earn this respect and have to maintain a black and white rule of developing moral values in their children. Live life, love life, and live life to the fullest with a clear set of moral values and displayed with love.

PARENT AND CHILD

 1 Avoid disrespectful body language when your parents are talking to you. Show your parents that you care by being attentive when they talk to you. Stand straight with your arms relaxed at your sides. If your parents think you are not listening, then they are more likely to get angry and assume you do not care. Examples of body language that signal a disrespectful attitude are:[1]

Crossing your arms and looking the other way.
Tapping your foot impatiently while they are talking.
Rolling your eyes when you disagree with something.
Staring at them aggressively, or glaring at them.
Avoid interrupting your parents while they are talking. Let your parents say what they need to say before you respond. Don’t interrupt them in the middle of a sentence if you disagree with something they have said. Instead, wait until they have finished speaking.[2]Once they are finished talking, ask, “May I say something, please?”

Ask for clarification. It is ok if you don’t understand what your parents are trying to tell you. If you find yourself in this situation, repeat back in your own words what they said to you for clarification purposes. This way, both you and your parents will be on the same page, and miscommunication is less likely to occur.[3]
Say, for example, “What I heard is that you want me to finish my homework and chores before I hang out with my friends. Is that correct?

 

 

These suggestions are the Method 1 of this informative article. To read the entire article in three methods of talking to your parents with respect, please click on the title and it will take you to the entire article.

 

 BIBLE VERSE:
Ephesians 6:1-4                 
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

(C) Copyright 2012-2017 Arline Miller with all rights and privileges reserved. Third party material is sourced to the original location if known for credit reference. Photos may not be the property of Sipping Cups.

OCTOBER SCENTS

TODAY THE WORDS are OCTOBER SCENTS. I am seeing so many wonderful and amazing displays of fall recently and it brought me to examining what I feel about fall and especially the month of October. While thinking about October, my sense of smell became a priority of thought. As fall enters our lives; we start thinking toward the baking times, the family reunion events, the upcoming holidays and it made me realize October starts my nostrils to fill with the warm and comfort smells we associate with Fall.

 

                    No blog message on the October Scents would be complete without the scents of mountain air and beautiful leaves with their awesome display of color. This video was composed from our recent changing of the leaves vacation.  Photos in video are property of Greg and Arline Miller

Pumpkin flavored everything seems to be in all ads, coffee, shakes, lattes, cookies, pies, tarts and breads bring the strong allspice and cinnamon flavors. Answer me this…..As I listed these tasty and fragrant delights, did your smell sense rise especially when I mentioned cinnamon? Let’s go on a little memory trip and visit the gingerbread land.
When I was young and always ready for something Momma had baked; I looked forward to her tea cakes, her pound cakes (which we would always catch her out of the kitchen and jump up and down to cause it to fall; bless Momma’s heart it was years before she realized her cakes would have been beautiful if we hadn’t sabotaged her efforts to have it taste better), but I remember her gingerbread best of all. I could smell the fragrant aroma of the gingerbread loaf before I made it home from school. Walking up to our house, I could smell it’s wonderful smell and I was so excited. I am speaking from my heart but this was a unanimous contention for all of my siblings. It was a wonderful and joyous moment and now a great memory of those spices and more importantly, the love shown by our Mom.
We, as humans, are susceptible to smells as much as taste. We are usually expressive either pro or con about smells and aromas. Fall presents strong aromas and seemingly tied to family gatherings and holidays. This brings me to my focus for this message.
Now for the deeper thought……As our senses tell us what aroma is filling the air; we need to be as conscious of who and what is filling our lives. We need to “sniff” our home environment and smell out what children are hearing and watching. We need to appreciate the warm, comforting times we spend with our family and friends. We can seek out God more and take time to thank Him for all the sweet blessings and treats of life. We want to cherish the good taste of life while we smell the cinnamon aroma of living and loving life.

DAILY FEATURED BIBLE VERSE:
Proverbs 15:17 ESV 

Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a fattened ox and hatred with it.


(c) copyright 2012-2017 Arline Lott Miller. The material here copyrighted, use only by permission.

CALLING ALL SEENAGERS

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CALLING ALL SEENAGERS seemed to be a great fit for me since my 50th Class Reunion happened last weekend. Yes, that is right 50 big ones since I roamed the halls of my high school. You may ask what is a “seenager” and I came up with that word when I witnessed the high energy from my classmates. It is a combo from Senior and Teenager and I think I will keep this word to describe those who are seniors but who act like teenagers.

Here is what I witnessed and I have to confess, participated. I think most of the ladies took a little more time with our hair and for those of us who wear make up…a little more cover up and maybe a new wrinkle cream. I ordered a new top so I was in the same mode. The guys may not have gone to as much trouble but I know the ones who have lost some or all of their hair took a look and wondered how many classmates would say something.

I had a silent laugh when Claire handed me my name tag with my senior picture and looked at that famous 60’s hair flip. I thought that picture’s title should be changed because I am a true senior now and that was a little premature titling all of us teenagers. Time would take care of that error and with time comes a lot of change and all of them not necessarily bad changes. I am including a video from that night and it includes the names of the classmates who have passed away. I was asked to do an inspirational short speech which I based on Where Do We Go From Here. It is humorous but what I found which made it hilarious were the amusing jabs from my dear friend Jan Malphus Downing backing up my remarks.

Our class president James O Smith pays tribute to our former classmates with a lighter follow up speech by Arline Miller. Videoed by Jan Malphus Downing with great interjections of humor.

As I woke up the morning after the reunion, several thoughts came to mind and I posted a Facebook message which I am attaching as it sums up a seenager’s response. Each day is valuable and we shouldn’t miss an opportunity to show love and friendship to each other.

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Bloggers Side Note: May all of my classmates remain Seenagers with the energy, passion, and friendship. Our bodies may be reflecting a Senior Feel but in our hearts and minds we are and will always be the teenagers at Coffee High.

LIVE LIFE; LOVE LIFE; AND LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST by remaining yourself because you are unique, interesting, and lovable just the way you are.

(C) Copyright 2012-2017 Arline Miller with rights and privileges reserved. Photos are not exclusively property of Sipping Cups and if source is known, reference credit will be given. All third party material if known will be sourced to original location.

HOW TO ENJOY A REUNION

HOW TO ENJOY A REUNION is the focus for today’s post. I want to post the definition of the word reunion before we get into the discussion. According to Google:

re·un·ion

rēˈyo͞onyən/
noun
  1. an instance of two or more people coming together again after a period of separation.
    “she had a tearful reunion with her parents”
    • a social gathering attended by members of a certain group of people who have not seen each other for some time.
      “a school reunion”
    • the act or process of being brought together again as a unified whole.
      “the reunion of East and West Germany”

     

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Basically there are two popular reunions:

  • Reunion of classmates, employee groups, unions, fraternities, associations, and military groups.
  • Reunion of family or close friends

 

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TIPS FOR ENJOYING YOUR CLASS REUNION. THE GUIDEPOST offered a great guide and with my 50th class reunion I thought I might benefit from these suggestions:

by – Posted on Aug 8, 2016

In my experience there are three schools of thoughts when it comes to class reunions: There are those who wouldn’t miss theirs on a bet, those who wouldn’t attend one if their lives depended on it, and the rest of us, who find the prospect of reconnecting with our former classmates both intriguing and daunting.

I’ve always taken the approach that a class reunion will definitely be interesting, and it just might prove to be fun. I attended my (gulp) 40-year reunion a few weeks back, and, like the trio of 10-year gatherings that preceded it, it was not only less painful than I might have feared, it was downright enjoyable.

Skeptical? I understand. But hear me out: Following the reunion, I turned to my classmates on the Facebook page we’d used to organize the event and asked them for tips that might help those people who were hesitant to take the plunge to enjoy the experience, and I have to say, the class of ’76 came through with flying colors. Here are 10 indispensable tips for making the most of your next reunion, even if it happens to be your first.

1. If it’s the first time you’ve attended a reunion, whether you graduated ten years ago or thirty, make plans to go with a friend.

It helps to have someone you’re close to who can serve as “home base” as you try to overcome your nerves (almost everyone experiences a bit of nervousness at a reunion) and reach out to your former classmates.

READ MORE: SCHOOL SUPPLIES AND MORE!

2. Peruse your old yearbook before you go.

This tip grows more useful with every passing decade. If you’re just ten years removed from high school, chances are pretty good that you’ll recognize everyone at the reunion, but after forty years, I can tell you from first-hand experience, not all the faces you’ll encounter will be so familiar. And when you do recognize former classmates, you may briefly struggle to recall their names. A little time with your yearbook could a long way toward alleviating both problems.

It’s also a good idea to bring your yearbook along to the reunion. Your friends who are struggling with all those not-so-familiar faces and names will thank you as they sneak a quick peek at it.

3. Use Facebook to (re)connect with folks ahead of time.

Facebook and other social media outlets have really had an impact on the reunion experience. Ten years ago, at my 30-year reunion, I had very little idea what was going on in the lives of my classmates or, in some cases, how their appearance had changed.

But this time, I was familiar going in with the basic circumstances of many of my classmates’ lives and was able to quickly move beyond the typical catch-up chatter (and in some cases, to avoid asking awkward questions) and spend some quality time with them.

READ MORE: ONE OF THE CROWD

4. Be proactive.

Don’t sit at a table waiting for classmates to approach you. It’s perfectly normal to feel shy or be nervous—everyone goes through that—but try to push past it. Just find a familiar face or two and say hello. It won’t take long at all before those nerves dissipate.

5. Introduce yourself when greeting a classmate you’ve not seen in years.

Don’t put people on the spot by asking them if they remember you. They may recognize your face right away, but still experience momentary difficulty in recalling your name. That happens to most of us at one time or another, so simply state your name when saying hello. Believe me, your former classmates will appreciate it.

6. If you sometimes feel you don’t know what to say, ask others to tell you about their lives.

As you learn about the paths your classmates have followed through life, you’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll be inspired, and you’ll be reminded that everyone goes through good times and bad. It’s one thing we all have in common.

7. Look at everyone with new eyes and a forgiving heart.

If you encounter someone who hurt or offended you in high school, try to let bygones be bygones. Chances are, they don’t remember the incident and if they do, they are very likely now sorry for their behavior. Give everyone you encounter at the reunion a pass on the past and you’ll be pleasantly surprised at how decent and kind most of your classmates have turned out to be.

8. Don’t compare your insides to anyone else’s outsides.

With each passing year, the social pressures of high school—the resentments, the rivalries, the unrequited affections—fade away, but many of us are still tempted to compare our lives with others’. You may encounter some people at your reunion who appear to be especially prosperous and happy, but we can’t always know someone else’s pain or troubles, past or present.

READ MORE: DOES NOSTALGIA MAKE YOU HAPPY?

After a decade or more, it’s a good bet that every person in the room has experienced setbacks and heartbreak as well as good times, so be happy for those who appear to be doing well, sympathetic to those who might be struggling, and embrace your own journey, wherever it has led you.

And most of all, don’t worry about your weight, your hair (or lack thereof), your wrinkles, or what you’re wearing. Before you know it, you and your classmates will all feel as if you are back in high school and you won’t even know notice the changes the years have wrought.

9. Spend time with people you didn’t know very well back in the day.

This is one aspect of reunions that can be very rewarding, especially for those of us who went to larger schools. There were more than 450 people in my graduating class, for example; there’s no way I could have been close with them all.

At the past couple of reunions, though, I’ve had the chance to become better acquainted with some former classmates I was only casually acquainted with back in the day, and it has been a gift. Not only can you reconnect with old friends at your reunion, you just might make some new ones.

10. Don’t talk politics—focus instead on the memories.

This was especially good advice for me, as my recent reunion took place during this heated election season, but it’s a good policy for any such gathering. Who needs friction when old friends have convened to celebrate the bonds they share?

If you follow the above advice, I think you’ll find your reunion to be a positive experience, one that is not only interesting but rewarding and fun.

Our thanks go out to the members of Oklahoma City’s John Marshall High School, Class of 1976, who contributed their wisdom, experience and insights to this story.

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Here is another good guide on Enjoying Your Family Reunions:

It can be different this year. Imagine walking into your next family reunion feeling excited about being there and knowing that you’ll leave feeling happy about your whole experience.

It’s your choice. You can use these five tips to make your next family gathering the experience you’ve always wanted.

Tip #1 – Decide What You Want to Experience

We call this creating an intention. If you aren’t very clear about what you do want to experience, then it will be difficult to make that happen. And it may be hard for you to even notice it when it is happening. How do you get clear about your intention? Ask yourself these questions:

“How could my family and I benefit from this?”

You might choose fun, caring and harmony. Or peacefulness: “If my experience today could only be peaceful I would walk out happy and wanting to return next time.” Take some time to imagine all the qualities that would make your next family gathering a wonderful experience for you.

“How could you and your family benefit from this quality of experience?”

Perhaps you could gain a greater sense of connection. You and your family might really look forward to seeing each other again. Or you might be more playful with one another. The time you spend identifying these benefits will help you remember your intention if things start to get challenging at the gathering.

Tip #2 – Know That People Are Doing the Best They Can

You might ask: “When Aunt Sue complains about everything under the sun, is she doing the best she can? When Dad criticizes me about every part of my life, is he doing the best he can?”

Yes. They’re doing the best they can.

Stop and think about it. Do they look like they’re having fun at these times? Are they being effective at getting what they really want? If they knew a way to take care of themselves that was more fun and that worked better at getting what they really wanted, don’t you think they would do it?

So if you get upset seeing people act the way they do, remind yourself: They’re doing the best they can. Then get back to creating what you want to experience as fast as you can.

How do you do that?

Tip #3 – Don’t Take Things Personally

“Don’t take it personally if someone says that what I’m doing is stupid?”

You can avoid taking things personally if you start with this understanding: Everything people do or say starts with a desire to support something they value.

And what could that be? Guess.

Your father says to you: “How can you possibly think that starting your own business is a smart thing to do?” He might value security, or predictability. He might be worried about how you’ll continue to pay your bills. Believe it or not, this might be his attempt to contribute to you. And, he is Doing The Best He Can.

So the next time you hear something you don’t enjoy, the next time you want to defend yourself and justify your position, STOP and remember: It’s about them. Don’t take it personally.

Instead, try to be curious. “Wow, I wonder what’s going on with them?” Imagine yourself in the other person’s shoes: “If I said or did that, what might be going on with me?” See if you can guess.

Tip #4 – Clarify Your Understanding About What Others Want

One big cause of upset between people is not being sure about what they want from each other.

Have you ever heard people express concerns or complaints like: “I just don’t know how I’m going to pay my rent this month?” Or: “I hate it when we start eating without giving thanks first.” Or maybe a family member starts talking to you about how your favorite cousin is making a mess of her life.

What happens then? Do you feel confused or uncomfortable? Do you try to justify yourself, explain the situation, or give advice?

Whenever you feel uncomfortable hearing people’s concerns or complaints, we believe this is partly caused by your not understanding what they want from you.

We suggest you start asking for clarity. Say or guess out loud what you think the other person might want from you.

Before you start, remember tips 1, 2, and 3. Get present to the intention you created for the gathering. Remember people are doing the best they can. Don’t take things personally.

Suppose cousin Jim says: “I just don’t know how I’m going to pay my rent this month.” What does he want? Ask him: “Do you want to brainstorm some ideas about how you might get your rent this month?”

Or when your grandmother says: “I hate it when we start eating without giving thanks first.” What does she want? Ask her: “Would you like to see if somebody is willing to give thanks before we eat this year?

If your guesses aren’t accurate, they’ll let you know by saying something else that gets closer to what they do want. Your guess will open the way for a conversation that can lead to more understanding and less stress for both of you.

Tip #5 – Develop Your Ability to Be Grateful

What you focus your attention on grows.

If you constantly notice things that cause you pain, then you will continue to suffer. “How inconsiderate he is.” “She doesn’t care about me.” “He’s the most selfish person I’ve ever known.”

Try focusing your attention on what you do enjoy.

It may sound simple. But ask yourself: “What would it be like if I spent my day simply noticing everything that I enjoy about being with my family?”

Imagine looking for all the things that you do enjoy, and being thankful for them. “It smells so good in here; I can’t wait to eat.” “I’m so grateful that everyone cares enough to spend time together.” “It’s nice that my mom enjoys having these gatherings at her house.”

How would you feel if you only focused your attention on the things you do enjoy?

So here’s the plan for a family reunion experience just like you’ve always wanted 1. Decide what you really do want to experience 2. Know that people are doing the best they can 3. Don’t take things personally 4. Clarify your understanding about what others want and 5. Focus on what you enjoy

Following this plan is the fastestPsychology Articles, easiest way to enjoy any family experience.

Note from Arline Miller: In all things, familiar or unfamiliar surroundings, BE YOURSELF! You have qualities and unique traits that are your own and this is the best way to reflect to others the best image. I have been in many environments and crowds and what works best for me is not to “try to work it” and do what comes naturally to me. I suggest everyone do the same. It is okay to not interject something into every conversation and give the speakers your undivided attention. It is okay to smile and laugh when it is appropriate. The biggest advice I can give is relax, move around as much as you are comfortable, and remember the other people here are friends, classmates, etc. and they are feeling the same as you. HAVE FUN!

(C) COPYRIGHT 2012-2017 Arline Miller with all rights and privileges. Third party material is sourced to original location if known for reference credit. Photos are not the property of Sipping Cups unless stated.

 

 

TOO MANY COOKS CAUSE BOILING POTS?

 

potTOO MANY COOKS CAUSE BOILING POTS?  Since tomorrow is time for a family reunion and I have cooking on my mind as well as Greg smoking his popular hams, this topic came to mind about 5 am this morning. I thought I would share a thought and maybe you can relate it to other phases of life other than cooking.

As most of us learned to cook from others,  we have probably experienced what I refer to as too many cooks can cause a pot to boil over. Let me share this probability. When I was learning how to make dressing for Thanksgiving and I had one of the best cooks teaching me, I was placed in charge of dicing the onions. Now, who would have thought it would be a big ordeal to chop some onions. I found out differently as my MIL has a specific way and size to those onion pieces. I felt inapt in my chopping skills; I felt like a failure in the art of making dressing. I moved on to the boiled eggs and that feeling of not being able to construct this masterpiece was overwhelming. I questioned my abilities over some onions and eggs. I have since then made her dressing for every holiday and amazingly, no one objected to my chopping skills. I don’t say this sarcastically but realistically because I chop my onions and eggs the same way she instructed me. It was a learning curve but my point of this lesson is we have a natural tendency to do things differently or we think differently but in the end all of us ultimately want is delicious dressing.

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I will relate to another experience of cooking. While we were in Germany, I grew very close to our German landlords and their families. The grandchildren were learning English in school and they helped me with the German language. I made a refrigerator lemon cheesecake and my sweet landlady wanted to learn how to make it. I would measure it out in American style and she would put it in her measuring cups since she spoke no English. When I would think I had gotten all of the mixture out of a cup or bowl, she took it and “cleaned” it out until I could have placed it into the cabinet. It was sparkling and instead of appreciating her efforts, I wanted to get through with making the dish. My mind was focused on not having it get too warm and getting it into the refrigerator while she was focused on no waste. Both of our thoughts were good thoughts but different from each other’s.

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Good cooks as well as good people have different thoughts and focus. This brings me to my point of this blog post……..As different as we are, our intentions are similar. We may have different ideas and methods but in the end, do you think most people want peace and prosperity? As much as we like our methods and processes to be the right one or the best possible way to proceed forward, it is wise to look at how the other person has derived to their conclusive method. We can learn from others; others can learn from us. The best solution is if two or more cooks are in the kitchen, each is assigned different dishes and remember to stir the pot to keep it from boiling over.

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LIVE LIFE; LOVE LIFE; AND LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST by listening more, talking less, and applying what we learn and discarding the criticism.

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